I'm sitting in front of the computer dreaming of a wide expanse of wilderness unpopulated by the sounds of the modern world.

I'm dreaming this particular fantasy because of my new neighbors. There seems to be a "gathering" of individuals and this impromptu Algonquin round table has, thus far, produced the following intellectual bon mots: "Fuck you. No, FUCK YOU! Man, fuck you, motherfucker." I know every word of their conversation because they have thoughtfully (a) decided to scream everything, and (b) have left their balcony door wide open, the one right next to mine.

I didn't think the noise level could rise, but silly me, proven wrong again by the helicopter hovering overhead. Now, when I say "hovering," I don't mean "flying around in my general area." I mean "circling and hovering directly over my apartment building, so close that the windows are shaking and it sounds like they're going to make a roof landing any minute."

I go out on my balcony to get a better look and see what looks to be a police helicopter with a man somewhat hanging out of the side with the door open. I think to myself, "Thank god, the police have sent a professional sniper to take out my neighbors" and get a warm glow about my tax dollars at work. But, alas, no such luck; they seem only interested in the "circling and hovering."

Finally, the helicopter flies away (still no apparent reason for the twenty-minute "fly-by"). At the same time, my neighbors decide to go (and this is a direct quote) "to the bar with all the goddamn naked chicks, yo."

::sigh:: And they didn't even invite me.